Wednesday, September 1, 2010

This is kinda morbid, but I'll put a funny Tia Katie twist to it...

Found a tip on Attu Sees All about a SF Chronicle series about suicide and the Golden Gate Bridge.

not sure what happened to the other pic...
No, not suicidegirls (NSFW) although you should check that site out when you're not at work. Where it's not safe.

Anycrap, while I was happy this morning, having just read some articles about golden gate bridge jumpers now i'm kinda creeped out. I'm also convinced that a viable, structurally sound engineering/architectural solution exists that will preserve the view from the bridge and prohibit further suicides. By all means, do it.

Here's some stuff which will make nice, quick bloggy snippets, but not a whole post unto themselves...

excerpt from The Allure: Beauty and an easy route to death have long made the Golden Gate Bridge a magnet for suicides
Robert Blyther, a 27-year-old Navy veteran, flew from Virginia to San Francisco in December 1980 specifically to jump off the bridge to protest the election of Ronald Reagan as president.

You dumbass. WTF did you think was gonna happen? That Reagan would step down because some 27-year-old social retard was willing to sacrifice his life for some loser Democrud agenda? Moron. I hope there are still bits of you floating around in the bay. Why didn't you just slash somebody's tires or something? Rob a bank. Go to vegas and have the drunken sex with prostitutes. Those would have gotten you just as much attention, and would have been a lot more fun.

hey lookee here 16Peon, anotherexcerpt from The Allure: Beauty and an easy route to death have long made the Golden Gate Bridge a magnet for suicides
Mark Finch, 33, was a tall, high-strung Englishman living in San Francisco. Stylish, gifted and chronically depressed, he was in the process of coming off the antidepressant Effexor when he jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge on Jan. 14, 1995. When he died, having left his leather briefcase on the bridge's pedestrian walkway and a number of suicide notes on his office desk, his friends were stunned. Jenni Olson, his co-director at the San Francisco International Lesbian & Gay Film Festival, recently made a film, "The Joy of Life," that deals in part with Finch's suicide and the bridge's long legacy of death.

Why the bridge and not another form of suicide? "Of course, given his personality, I just thought, 'Oh, how Mark' that it would be so spectacular. He doesn't do anything in a small way," Olson said.

Oh so what you're saying is that your friend is was an attention whore. Well I guess that makes it OK then.

If I were ever fucked up enough (and psychologically speaking, not alcoholly speaking) to decide to jump off the Golden Gate Bridge (which, incidentally, is not under CalTrans jurisdiction) here's what I would do...

Tia Katie's DIY Suicide-o-rama, Engineer-style!
1) Take taxi to Golden Gate Bridge from the Zoo where I would have spent my last few dollars, saving enough for taxi fare.
2) Go to lightpole #80, in honor of SF 49er Jerry Rice.
3) Leave laminated copy of Rudyard Kipling's Sons of Martha next to my Professional Registration and my Engineer Stamp (registration and stamp are still in the works as of November 2005)
4) Jump
5) Hit water at 75mph
6) Die
7) Be deprived of the fruits of Heaven for eternity having died in a state of Mortal Sin
8) Wish I hadn't partaken in steps 2-7

Anyway, on a lighter note Happy Wednes-dee!

Katie Greene


  1. just stopping by to show my support...nice blog

    check mine

  2. Nice read, how do you do that, the yellow boxes?

  3. viperman: i have no fucking idea, i copypasta'd from my blog from five years ago? hold on, lemme check for you

  4. viperman: used "table" in html... some of the only html i know. check it out.

  5. Oh thanks ok I'll try it in one of my posts in a few days when It'll fit in XD


  6. idk how u make ur page look so cool haha
    showin support check me out?

  7. Oooh why did you link SG, don't you know its no-fap september? Q.Q

  8. nigma: by that logic, i should remove the jerry rice pic, but i can't bring myself to do that.