Sunday, September 12, 2010

i wouldn't have such a problem with him if Ocean's Twelve hadn't been such a shitty movie

(note from Katie:  I forget what the context of this post was.  i think the blog owner AnnA was on some political rant about George clooney or something.  doesn't matter.)

Seriously. Making Ocean's Thirteen is about as good an idea as making a Gigli 2. Or Thanksgiving with the Cranks.

Don't get me wrong. Ocean's Eleven (the modern one) was a good movie and one of my favorites. But Ocean's Twelve? It's a suckfest that'll make you want to set your browser's homepage to shitantics. It's such a shitanticky movie, I don't even feel bad spoiling the ending. I'm doing you a service by giving this shit away for free.

OK, I actually do feel bad. Highlight the spoiler box below.

Well, no I don't feel bad. I suppose I want you to see the movie just once. You'll want to take a hammer to your DVD player after the shitty Julia Roberts gag described below, but watch the movie up to that point to see if you can see it coming.

<spoiler sucksbutt="Ocean's Twelve">
Near the end, one of the gags that falls flat on its face and which non-shitanticky 16thPeons can see coming from a mile off-- it's a gag you can tell they were banking on being ranked with the funniest of movie moments in all of filmmaking history-- Julia Roberts' character in the movie, Tess Ocean, is incorporated in a heist by passing her off as... Julia Roberts. What a pukefest. Not even a full-frontal nude scene with Catherine Zeta-Jones herself would've saved this ensemble piece of shit.

Like I was saying. Ocean's Twelve sucked major dead bear.

Katie Greene, Vice President of Public Relations, Expresso Parking


  1. unfortunately i have to agree, i watched oceans 12 or 13 with some friends and thought it was absolute shit, all they did was hire good actors and place them in the same room to talk to each other over some shitty guys script!

  2. I didn't personally see this movie but thanks for sharing, maybe one day I will watch it :)

  3. gurl u crazy

    Check it

  4. I still hate that movie to this day.

  5. i've seen it, but i forgot all of it.. :S


  6. yet anouther good advice from you:)

    spreading the loooove! :D

  7. I love ocean 12, the laser scene was awesome.

    Keep it up!

  8. >=O how do you.. i mean.. NO! of ocurse not!
    Shall mentioned thoughts never cross your mind again.. evil witch!

    smoochies n' poopies though.:*

  9. I'm getting sick of movie remakes.

  10. I loved Ocean's 12...well maybe just for Cathy..hell I dont even remember the story now.

  11. If it's an accident involving a trucker, bird or no, Meth is involved.
    Great blog, following!

    Daily Love!
    New cunt-punchingly good book review...